oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
Randomize
