Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
Randomize
