You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Randomize
