let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Randomize