we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
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