life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
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