I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
