To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Me. At least after what I've been through.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
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