So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
