I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
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