I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
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