so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
I will be naked everywhere
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Randomize
