I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Randomize
