I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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