I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
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