you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
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