Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
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