let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
Randomize
