so that wasnt chicken after all
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Randomize
