Small penises have feelings too.
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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