i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Randomize