My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
Randomize
