I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
