Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
