I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
Are my feet made of real feet?
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
