Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
I'm having a debate with **** over whether or not he is gay... what's your verdict?
GAY or at the very least bisexual.
His "joking around" with all of his roommates is clearly as act. He needs to step back and reevaluate his sexual orientation.
Weird... you've rode him.
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
She made me pour olive oil on her.
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
Randomize
