8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
