The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Randomize
