he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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