ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
Randomize
