I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize
