So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Dear Mark, please dispose of your crusty mcdonalds napkins used to jerk it at my desk
discrete masterbation is a lost art
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
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