you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
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