Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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