so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
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