My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
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