Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
Randomize
