I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
Randomize
