that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Randomize
