I didn't shave. On purpose
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Randomize