I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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