So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
