Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
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