Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
Randomize
