we have officially mastered the walk of shame
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Randomize