Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize