remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
is wine microwaveable?
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
Randomize
