Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
