They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
The struggles of a small town man whore
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
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