i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
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