I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
we made out on top of his cat.
Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Randomize
