Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
no more duck duck goose at the bar
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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