operation have a gay friend backfired
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
Boobs speak an international language.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
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